I should have started this blog entry months ago.
But it's not too late, the reason was that this is my engagement blog, and even if I share way too much and kind of have no secrets, there are still surprises that I had to keep to myself, and plans that have been canceled or changed, oh my god, so many changes, but now a week before the proposal, it's time to summaries them, before my mind will be overrun with wedding thoughts….
6 days away from the big day, we briefly discussed our D-day, things are not closed, but please try not to book travel plans for June of 2010.
My proposal is not the biggest secret in the world, in fact , it is too well known that some people think I already asked. So I am not very discrete, no one is perfect.
Today was the perfect day, we talked wedding, she knows when I will propose, but not where – though she has spoken about this place today and I did my best not to laugh . I am bad at poker but I don't think Alla noticed.
So today I was preparing her- asking her simple questions that the answer to them is yes and rating the answerJ I think I will get a rating 10 for the yes when I do ask – I just love the way her faces lights up for simple things. She talks about something and then remember some tiny detail, and totally light up – it can be some topping on something, the way a view looks from a window, the taste of something, the smell of something, I can't really explain it, but she lights up and I adore it. That is the response I am hoping to get.
On Wednesday a package arrived to the office via FedEx, it was narrow and long, I opened the package and removed the inner package, opened that and removed an envelope. After opening the envelope, there were 2 pages + a smaller envelope. The envelope was opened to reveal a small nylon zip lock bag. In the bag there was some little folder paper, and inside of it another blue paper which looks like wax paper, and in it on a little sponge type thing, sat a small perfect little diamond. I got this rock from Yaakov, Liora's cousin. Liora is my dad's unofficial wife (life partner? roommate? Companion? No sure what is the proper term), and he is in the diamond industry (I had no idea), so I had one less thing to worry about, and he came through. Till last week I didn't understand at all about diamonds and engagements, now I understand some. Enough to know that I have a rare gem and also a quality diamond.
I usually don't write about how I feel, but stick to what I am doing. But with Alla I knew it from the very beginning; she was, is and will be the one. Back in May my sister Michal asked me about her when we met, and I described her as a person of quality- Michal didn't need to hear any more and knew what I meant.
I am working hard to make this perfect – and now that I had a diamond, I needed to find a ring to match the quality. Finding a ring was not as easy as I thought it would be. There are tons of rings but I was looking for specific things as hinted by my future fiancée (who is my fiancéeJ by the time you will read this).
So I am looking for a big/small ring, from white/yellow gold or platinum, with or without diamonds on the side, with a classic look, where the ring over Lapps the diamond, with a princess cut, or square or round, not too large, not too small. In general that was it…J
No seriously – she wanted a classic ring, most rings I saw in the stores were thick rings with a diamond on top and many around it- they look phony impressive. So a narrow ring of white gold, where the ring overlaps the diamond on both side. There were not many of those, and even less with a fitting size for my purchased diamond. So I wandered around town looking for the perfect ring. And I think I found it. So now my little rock sits in a store in Wickliffe, while some jewelers connects the ring to it. I will get it by next Friday- just a day before Pday (a.k.a Eday).
So with a ring it's time to complete preparations on the how. Josh asked me in which language I would be asking, gosh josh – I didn't think about that question. I don't know yet. I also didn't not make a speech, knowing me, I would probably be in tears when I do ask , Hebrew or English (or Russian?).
My problem is Elton john. We seen his concert last year in Vegas, he is coming to Ctown with his pall Billy Joel to perform. I think I may change the plans to make that happen.
Next Friday – btw- the phone will be turned off, if you need urgent support, call 911. We meet at a hair salon, though I just cut my hair two weeks ago at Giuseppe's and it looks nice. I was requested to make it shorter, so it shall be cut, while Alla does something special. From there we proceed to with the Elton john Joel concert or go to a Greek festival. Alla is infatuated with Greece – so some Greek food, Greek dancing and Greek fun (can I break a plate?). If we will go to the concert, than we will go to the festival the next day, lucky it's a four day event. Then on Saturday may 23rd…
Let's go back a bit to plan A.
I try to avoid doing the kitschy things. And plan A was nothing but kitsch. My original Pday was the 1st of April. I cannot think of a more perfect date to propose. I was thinking of arranging a little scavenger hunt just for her in Erie and end up on my knees next to a jewelry store – say that I am a fool but…..private thoughts go here…. Seriously , I think it's original, memorable, and most of all, it's my way.
But Alla's many exams got in the way, and I had to improvise – when I came to Erie that week, I gave her a little pretty necklace instead.
We spoke than, and Alla wanted to wait till school was out, so she could focus. For me it could have been 6 months before, but I knew that she was asking for the right thing. So I started planning for the fall of 2009 – few dates came to mind – Rosh Hashanah was canceled for being kitsch, same goes for the last day of Sukkoth and Hanukah. I wanted the date to mean something. I didn't have a good date then, but then Alla's mom Dina came to the rescue. Why? In November she will celebrate her 50th birthday for the 20th time – actually the 21st time- but 20th sounds more round. And Alla's sister Hostess will celebrate the exact half age (get a calculator) and they decided to take a family cruise. My family had a bunch of cruises in the past few years and they jumped on the idea and my brother Yaron is bringing his family as well. At the time, Alla was not prepared to seriously discuss things, but I knew that if both families will be on the same ship and nothing official will be announced by then. I would be stingray food on the bottom of the ocean. I mentioned that to Alla – and it was decided to do it before November- by then it was still the fall of 2009.
I was searching for hot air balloon festivals and other interesting ways to propose and found plenty in the summer, but few in the fall, and none in close locations or great dates.
Since Alla has rotations in the fall, with one week taken for the cruise and the last 2 weeks of august in Alaska, free dates were becoming scarce. As time went by, Alla hinted that there is no need to wait that long- so now I had Alaska or the upcoming semester break. Few more hints and the fact that we will not be alone in Alaska, and finally the upcoming semester break was the time of P.
This 2 week break was not easy at all. May 23rd came quickly to mind since it is our 1 year anniversary – and I know , I don't do kitsch, but a hot air balloon that day, in chagrin falls, which is Alla's favorite little town in Ohio- come on, I can read the signs loud and clear. Chagrin falls is a small picturesque town with cute shops and a big water fall running through the town, we went there on august 12th to see a meteor shower and interrupted a gay couple making out by the water fall and by a cop who came to stop gay couples from making out. You have to admit that it is a sign. So by then it was plan D, I think. Then suddenly Israel came in to the picture, and the only fitting dates were may 22nd or a week after, so may 22nd it was, and doing it in Israel made sense, I was thinking now on May 28th, because it was Shavuot, I also looked at an option of going from here to a weekend in Greece (mikonos or santorini islands) and do it there (racer loves those white houses with the blue doors- hence the Greek festival). There are no direct flights from Cleveland to Athens, and from there to Israel- it was crazy expensive , I started looking at stops in other European cities and then the INS stepped and decided it was time for Alla to become a citizen and for that she had to get finger printed (buffalo on the day of Passover) and now an interview on may 28 in Pittsburgh. So Israel had to be pushed back, and Shavuot in Israel was just missed, with no holidays in sight, I reverted to my original date, plan j17 or something by now. I called the hot air ballooning but they would not agree to ride, on the 23rd, because it's a festival of hot air balloons and a race, they will not take passengers now – they will from the weekend after. So for now, on Saturday morning on the 23rd of May, we would go to chagrin falls in the morning and spend half a day watching balloons, And stay on the ground. Alla will be sure that I intend to propose there, but that is not my latest plan. So after a few hot air ballooning hours, we would go home and I have to pick up some things.
Today Alla noticed a business card of a lady. I think her name was Godiva. Alla asked me what it was, and I didn't think fast enough - so she knows that I am planning something with Godiva. I don't believe I ever had Godiva chocolate before this week. But I got some strawberries dipped in chocolate and strawberry banana chocolate kabobs… I will pick that up next week. Godiva is Alla's favorite chocolate, so it's in the picnic basket.
Oh yes I am proposing in a picnic at the Holden arboretum (a tree place). But not just yet. The basket - I haven't figured out what exactly will be in the basket – so far I have the chocolate. I will add some baked goodies from whole foods that she likes. I will get her favorite lemonade ,some fresh fruits from a farmers market. I will get some type of wine or an alternative that I can drink, a picnic blanket, a couple of glasses, cheeses, bread, butter, knives, forks etc… and also – the basket itself, which I don't have. Ahhh so many small details.
Why the arboretum you ask? When we started dating, I was into it, but Alla on the outside was not. almost a year ago, after we dated for about a month, I asked her spontaneously to go to the ABBA cover band in Michigan and she shocked us both by agreeing (and that crazy party we went to). You may say our first romantic real date was in the Ann Arbor arboretum. There is an arboretum here as well, and I have not been there yet, but Alla has, and suggested on more than 1 occasion that we should go there. Actually we mentioned romantic places today , and she mentioned that place again, I quickly looked the other way to refrain from bursting in laughter. I think I managed to poker her on this one. And so, an arboretum is a fitting place for us. If you have never been to an arboretum, it's a big garden, with lots of trees, and flowers from around the world.
after the hot air balloon, go to pick up the Godiva and other things like flowers. I am not a flower giving person, I never was, though I did give Alla flowers in the past on 2 occasions. But in the basket there will be flowers and now I know what are Racers favorite flowers – peonies – it's a Brand I never knew – in Hebrew its 'אדמוניות' . she also likes lilacs, and she wrote me that she like 2 other flowers, I guess she guesses correctly and want to get the perfect bouquet.
Since I was recently injured, I was afraid that walking in the arboretum would be painful , but now, I am off the crutches and walking almost normally, it should be better by next week – so that concern is gone.
We should walk one of the trails and stop somewhere nice and shady, open the blanket, pour the wine and ask…
So I have my reasons, ring ,basket, plan, I think I have my desired answer and I think I am asking the perfect person for me- all that's left is to enjoy life
I am not sending this yet till the 24th of may- I am sure I will have more thoughts by then so signing off for now.
Ok- it's noon on a Sunday and I am sitting on the couch and listening to a good CD before going to a street fair. Various people have asked me questions which made me think. Common questions are "are you going to ask permission from her parents" , "will she pick her ring". Honestly, I did not think to ask permission, I don't see it as one of my customs, I don't think it's a Russian custom either, but it is an American custom. I believe that if I ask I will get yes as an answer. I know Alla's mom knows that this is coming and she is always very accommodating and nice to me, so what do I have to fear? I guess everything… a No would be a disaster. It would not stop me from proposing, but it's a recipe for an uneasy life. Again I don't think I would get a no – I have been thinking this for a while now- ever since someone first brought this issue up. You know what, I should just ask, I am certain of the answer , and if not, I will just keep writing about this till my fingers bleed… ok I will update on the answer in the next paragraph…going now…wish me luck
Silly moments, I called Inna's house since I don't have Dina's number and got Igor , her husband who gave me the number, I asked him to keep this a secret.. I doubt it will not be known , simply to much gossip to ignore. So I called and got Aaron (Alla's dad). We don't speak much or any at all, since he does not know English or Hebrew, and I don't know any Russian. So I blurted that I was looking for Dina, he said she was not there (in English), so I called her cell, he answered again and I hung up. I don't know why, it was stupid of me. So I still hadn't asked the question. But I had other assignments to complete. Next stop was whole foods where I ordered a bouquet of Alla's favorite flowers. Peonies are spring flowers and Alla is a spring flower girl, but the rest of the flowers that she likes are all out of season already (so summer is here apparently), no daffodils, no bogonvilias , not even lilacs. But the key ingredient was the peonies, so a 3 color bouquet will be picked up next Saturday. I also ordered a berry pie and another fruit pie (the fruits are on top of the pie- it looks really nice. That too will be picked next week. I already have her favorite lemonade. From there I went to a street fair, scouted locations for my east and west games and moved on to Holden Arboretum – to see where I will propose. It's a beautiful place, but it was closed- I had a quick look around. There are several trails, I guess I will chose which route to take based on how my leg is doing next week, or check with the propose'e where should we go inside the park. I still need to pick a picnic basket, breads and cheeses, and some drinks.
The other commonly asked question is who picks the ring. I had mentioned this to Alla before and she was on the fence, finally deciding not to chose herself, but hinting heavily on the desired design. But I did get more than a couple of ohhhh from woman urging me to let her pick and how they went to pick their rings. I guess it would be easier to do that, but Alla's chose not to, so no.
Shhh if you say I told you, I will deny it. We started talking dates.. the idea was fall of 2010, but faith is in the way. Inna's daughter is turning 12, bat mitzvah time and it's to be held in Israel some time next summer. Since some of the family will be coming for the event. I can't have them come twice In one year, and I don't want them to have to chose. It's logical to do them both in the same time. This is way off from being final but the current plan (It's plan D I think) is mid June of 2010, only a year and 3 weeks away. Things will probably change like 10 times till then, it is scary, but it's happening and I am excited. Alla would kill me for not keeping this a secretJ. I am bad with secrets. To keep most of the above information for so long was difficult for me, so I shared with various people, co workers and meet up people which I see on rare occasions or often. Ok- Sunday ends… I am here in Erie with my future bride…it's so cool to say(write) that, this entry will continue tomorrow from the Olean Chalet.
So I didn't update from the Chalet, sue me! Its Thursday now and everything is setJ. I spent some time looking for a picnic basket, looked at some store and no luck, so I goggled and after various sites that suggested bringing a picnic basket to them, I struck picnic basket heaven "world market". And suddenly I had to choose from a variety of baskets, and now I have a cute basket. Next to the basket were lots of goodies, so I filled my basket with a little bottle of wine, a Cosmo cocktail, little jar of quality olives, balsamic vinegar, various cheeses, a hazel nut chocolate spread (not Nutela) – all these things will go nicely with the breads I already picked up, so whatever Alla will feel like eating, I will have it. After the completion of the basket, I went to pick up the important item. I have the ring (now 1 piece with the diamond) and it is now safely hidden in a regular drawer – likely Alla won't find it by "mistake".
This Saturday is our one year anniversary, and the fact that I am proposing does not exclude me from buying a gift for that, so I did. A cute bracelet - nothing fancy, but very cute – so I will give her that on Saturday morning , will that throw her off ? Probably not, I guess my blushing face will be too obvious to hide. The ring is so nice, and I am excited- should I skip work tomorrow- I thought I needed to at least some hours for final arrangements, but it's all done. All I have to do now is ask her parents… Alla is not working tomorrow so I need to find an appropriate time that she is not there- it will be complicated… but I must do it.
I already made death threats at work, so I would not be disturbed on Eday. But so many people know about it (I am everything but discrete), it's crazy, ok signing off – I have to update the standard blog…
Its Saturday night, it has been a grand day, and I will be glad to write it up in the next few days
For now…. Yes was the answerJ and I am simply happy. My Fiancée and I, so cute to say that… nothing special, just wanted to say fiancée
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