blogil: May 2012

well, this is probably the last birthday before I can officially say, I am old, but most likely 10 years before I said 35 is old, so who knows...

since after 35 years of experiance i still have no real idea what i want from my life, other then seeing the entire world and doing every fun thing possible. Career, just means for the above end. When i was asked 4 years ago, what i wanted to do five years from now (meaning next year...) i said a writer, though never completed more then 30 pages of a book ( i call it season 1) and updating this blog which i like doing very much it is still the ambition.

for this personal summery of 35 years i decided to take one memory or event, one from each year- not perhaps the most important, well definitly not the most important, but perhaps more interesting then the usual demographics, well this is what i am aiming at, lets see how this goes

Year 1- well, I dont remember but I was told that from about 8 months or so, I went to the toilet alone, sat on and did my business without being tought on the process, then called for help with the unpleasentries- it is strange that this memory came up from my dad when he was asked to write something about me as a surprise (very interesting album courtusey of Alla will be publish in 2 weeks or so) . this is not the kind of thing people brag about. Alla tells me that i can make a joke out of any situation when the words sh*t, crap and the like are mentioned, who knows , maybe it begun back then.

year 2- again no memory, but some how i had a close encounter with a radiator (Battery heater) , no sure whom picked a fight with whom but i ended with my first scar (you can see it when i shave my head) head wound at a young age, may explain things :)

Year 3- my 1st memory- it was in a nursury , it was a hot day and too cool off they hosed us with a hose, kind of like playing with sprinklers, it was fun. nothing special about this memory other then its my first.

Year 4- this memory might be early year 5, dont recall much but during kinder garden I was playing with the thing used to filter sand (like the sand box bucket but with holes) and trapped a bee in it, the bee chose to respond , ouch

Year 5- My first act of vandalism, we were playing in the parking lot on our building and I dont remember why but we got to a car anthena and I broke it, why, not sure- but i got a slap for that, deserved it. the only anthena i broke since then was in a car wash in new zealand, i was in the machine with the radio on (which opens the anthena) and the cleaning wheel broke it, it wasnt me...

Year 6 - for a year or so we lived in a rented appartment and one of the room contains lots of stuff of the owners, all piles toghether. we used to play in that room, exploring the unknown, climbing on things since that room was full, has my exploration crave begun then?

Year 7 - this was the year I proposed to Yael, I dont remember the event well , but they remembered , apparently we were supposed to live on a tree house, I guess I was never really in touch with reality. I dont know what was her response.

Year 8 - I was playing on a broken fence and slipped, busted my head...scar number 2, shaped like a bumerang. also found a little kitten which I named pussy (I was innocent then) that used to poop under my bed till he was a year old, then became insane ( i was not there that day) but the cat scratched my mother and brother badly , by the time i got home the cat was gone and they had to get shots.

p.s I ignored the great escape...

Year 9-

the days of my elementery school is a period i dont speak of often, almost never, with things I wont to forget, even now i get emotional writing about it, but of these years , that probably affected me more then any other period I remember one good memory. My borther an I were in the Orot cinema , that was its name at the time. and the cinema top half had 2 parts with a 2 chair wide coridor in the middle, and the top 2 seats had only stairs infornt of them, no one to block the view, the perfect seats. I being very skinny (back then) and short, could sneak in the line and run and grab those seats, dont recall which movie. during the inter mission when we returned from the Kiosk, the seats were taken. i was crying ( i was a serious cry baby) and after the movie i recall my brother confronting the seat takers, i dont recall what was said, there was no fighting, i just remember the feeling of someone standing up for me, and though i can write pages on negative events, this is the one positive I remember.

Year 10- from a young age I walways like to read, and one book I read was back to touichi , true story of a guy lost in the jungle. that year the author came to my school to tell his tale, and I read it before hand, and felt proud. I never idolised anyone, i guess he was the closest to a hero, though he only saved himself. 2 years ago I met the author again. I have a photo with him, I was very axcited to meet him. going to touichi (Bolivia) is high on my list (I cant beleive i have never been to south america...)

Year 11 - I climbed anything, trees, building... my school was only 2 floors, but it was still high, there was this water pipe on the side of the building reaching amlost to the top and I ued to climb it to the roof (which makes it the 3rd floor) and just sit on the roof, coming down was scarier , never fell.

Year 12 - not sure what was the name of that place that is long since closed but I was in line at this burger place and was talking to a couple of girls from my school but not in my class and I was flirting, making jokes about hot dogs. the next day i get my very first love letter, well not really a love letter, but lets date kind of letter. my first girlfriend. in those matters I was always a late bloomer, it didnt last long, my fault. I do recall that it was sort of a big thing for others in her class. I beleive it was Dorith who is now my 2nd cousin kind of (via my dad's wife), but wasnt then. that was asking me why I would date that girl. she was under the impression that i was popular, and the other girl wasnt. well, I was never popular, perhaps I was in the wrong class?

Year 13

Interesting year from demographic perspectives and my first trip abroad and i recall the huge stuffed whale my dad won in the fare that was in the back of the car with me all through Florida, without room for me to even lean back. by the time the trip was over, free willy was me getting out of the car.

Year 14 definitely a year of change, with the divorce, moving to a new home but this the year I stopped being short and skinny and became just below average height and no longer skinny, I didn't realize then , but i changed from being very social and open to a much more closed self.

Year 15 there was a talk in class about something called Metallica, which was a big thing at the time, but I was always out of touch with current music and didn't know what it was, I still have this problem today, learning new songs from my nieces Kareoki

Year 16 First time on a moped, in Cyprus where they drive on the left side (not that it mattered since I never drove before). how the bus didn't hit me i will never know, beginners luck but later that day on a mountain road , going down hill in a decent speed (for a moped) and sliding down the hill, but no damage to me or the bike, lucky me.

Year 17 I had a couple of crushes but I didn't dare say anything, girls are scary (yes...are).

Year 18 this is the year my travel lust begun i think. till than i had only 3 including Israel, it was a trip from paris to barcelona and i pushed to deatur to the principality of Andora and the drive to see the entire world begins. I also purchased my first CDs ever- elton john single and a pretenders single. still have them.

Year 19

definitly an interesting year, lots of events. I spent 4 month in southern lebanon (country #8), and shot a lot of shells, but never seen where they land. one day we were shooting smoke shells as a cover fire for some infantry unit, not a thing we did often but this time the commander of that unit(several hours later) went on the com, and they put it on speaker and he was thanking us for saving his units life. artillery is all work and no glory but this one thank you is worths months of greased hands.

Year 20

the most famous event for me was getting shot! but lets choose something else more important. I was a acourse that would make me a sergent. I showed potential but i was too imature and not strong mentaly. the 1st week i was there i stood at the end of the group of cadets on the 1st time we met our commander and i was unlucky to be picked as acting commander (each cadet has to be for a week) for the week that precedes the course. i was nervous as hell and barely made it through the week, letting everything effect me. mid course I was made cadet commander again (some poeple got a team leader, 4-5 teams and one group leader. a,k,a me, that week. again I didnt delegate, i took everything i increased my own level of preasure that was already very high to max levels. one of the real commanders of the course always got on my nerves (not sure why) but I was reading the artilary units to go to for training and doing most of the work (not delegating...) and running from task to task without thinking. I was on edge and than this commander says something small, i dont recall what , but it was something like, why didnt you do something (some small irrelevant task) and i snapped. i wish i had a video of this event, for the next 2 minutes i am cursing and shouting at the commander, not sure where that came from, but i let out all my frustration on him, and then i finaly relaxed. i sign a waiver for the course, not sure if they would have let me continue, a depressing period of several days ended and i was sent back to my batallion. I was too young emotiionaly for that course so it was a good thing, how ever 9 days later i was shot.... i consider my self the easiest IDF wounded in history, but there may be others just as lucky.

year 21

a better year then the one before. i began being more serious, i was given my own troop carrier vehicle to maintain and shown some signs of being a grownup. we were on an excersize in the golan straights, i was driving my troop carier (with ammo in the back, not troops) , its fun to drive those huge things but the drill lasted all night and i need my sleep. on a stop i fell a sleep only to be woken up by one of the officers , they called me on the radio and i didnt hear (examplery war readyness). we kept going and on the next stop i fell a sleep once more, got a detention from the officers. it annoyed me , since i have not slept much the previous night, gourd duty, then drive all day, then sit on a chair and stay awake, and you know I fall asleep everywhere. the day later i told my team lead that i wanted out (nerves always got me ahead... well this was the first case) , he left and gave me 5 minutes to think, when he returned and asked where, i said officers course. leaving NCO course the year before led me to the better course and finaly out of artillary. i was summoned for the battalion commander that night and with in a week i was at the pre-officers course...this time i passed.

Year 22 discharge. as I left the Erez crossing where my unit was stationed, on my way home after 3 years, the 1st song i listened to in the car ( I chose it) was "but i still havent found what im looking for" by u-2. chosen on purpose and it would be a symbol of my twenties.

the drive to see the world continues with a rush of 7 europeans countires in a short time

Year 23- do you know doc from back to the future... well I went with Amir to universal studios in a big trip throught the west and when they asked for volunteers in a certain height, and weight group that matched mine, i immediatly jumped in, i was led back stage and dressed up like the doc and was given my lines, i was nervous for my show business debut and when the time came i opened the window. from the other side of the window stood a stage that looked like the center town from back to the future, an i was in the window of the tower , holding the power cables and shouting "marty , i am going to send you back to the future".

15 minutes! i dont think it was even 15 seconds, but it was awesome:)

this year i have finaly started dating, girls are still scary, i was still way too shy and didnt know what i was doing. it was actualy two days before my 23 birthday when i went on a date with miss pink. this girl had a very pink skin, her brother as well, it was a blind double date, she was 21 i think, and on the way back she gets flirty, and i think i said that i dont know what i am doing. I know i am almost 23, but that night was my first kiss. I told you i was a very very very late bloomer. it became more interesting later but i kep my virtue. with my birthday coming up, I was pretty sure what will happen on date #2. i spoke about this with the same amir from the trip above. I always had a concious and i was always stupid... but i didnt want this to be my first, so i broke it off. years later i would say that my first time was the next girl i dated, that was some one i liked, on a beach , very romantic moment, but still with virtue in tact...

Year 24

other then no more virtue... first relationship... I started going to theraphy and spill what ever i had to spill for several months, that helped me open up my maturing process was on the right track, but still ways to go. later that year i went to a brain washing event called the landmark forum. its not really brain washing, but a kind of group therapy with 200 people in the room and you get to talk about many things with the person sitting next to you whom is a stranger, and every session people rotate, so every time you get a new stranger. and since humans tend to listen to strangers more then to their friends , this works. well during this intance session i made calls to friends and family, apologizing for things long forgotten and really opening up. after that i felt like the king of the world and with my new found openees went for a 5 months trip to new zealand , australia and nepal. I was finaly my old (young) self again, open, social, happy

i was able to spent 2 months in austraila , by my self, meeting people on the way, hitch hiking 2000k from aires rock to melbourne, making friends every where. I was still shy around girls and had a bunch of missed opportunities on this trip but I was alive. I never went on such a trip since, , work and school are in the way, but I always crave for another such a trip, it didnt matter that i slept in tents, waited 13 hours at one spot for a hitch hike, got super bad sun burn in bondy beach and was almost bit by a dingo (which did not get the baby), that feeling of discovery is second to none.

year 25

I had greduated but still worked for a small internet company , building web sites for the movie industry and assisting in creation and maintenance of an Election program to count votes and manage voters for a national primaries.

We won (well , mitzna did, we just helped do the techi stuff) and after we gave data from the voter database to asking party officials. internal election were approching and i was supplying the data, nothing fancy, just basic queries.

one morning i was woken up early with a call, something went wrong with the data i gave. a parliment memeber at the time, sent letters to prospect voters, the letters had content aimed at the elderly, but because on my mistake, the letter were sent to the young voters of the party. when we worked pre primaries- the age was kept in a date of birth field, after that, when we had the main party databse, this data was kept as age, when you pull d.o.b < 32 (or what ever it was), but now you use age, well you can see how this tiny mistake can cause trouble. this was two days till the election and we helped do damage control, by remailing (mail not email) for tens of thousands of people, with our tiny company taking the financial burden. B my manager and the CEO (tiney company) didnt even fire me, he was a real classy guy, real gentelman, i cant say enough good things on him. that day was the worse professional day of my life. and now i learned the importance of QA. few months later after working in many low paying jobs (arranging stock at the supermarket, handing fliers, selling news papers etc...) a guy i called at the land mark forum the year before, recomennded me for a QA job, which i would have for the next 7.5 years. now that I understand the importance of testing and i am much more mature and open, i thrive.

Year 26

the main event was a rugby sevens game. I used to be very fast which helps me as a winger. there was a seven a side tournament, we played well and made it too the final, but on the way with the quick short games i had bad cramps on my left thigh, but a final is a final and i bandaged my leg up and kept playing. in the final we got creamed in the 1st half, it was bad, on the 2nd half, i got my break, not to even the score but to reduce the defeat and i ran passed the other guy towards the try line, then i heard something snap, a second later i am on the ground, the 1st major injury with a turn thigh muscle....so painful. I never sprinted at 100% since... that event was on TV on channel 5, an i have tried several times to get the tape, but no luck.. help is appreciated.

Year 27 Time for independence, moved out for an apartment in Kiriat Ono , closer to work and taking responsibility for myself. in this year and the previous i had a series of relationship of some potential but i was not ready yet, i guess you have to experiment to know what you want.

Year 28 2 events. the first, my recently arrived new manager is annoying me... its becoming a theme. on the 1st day of testing a version, i told him we would be playing with the version, and he comes 30 minutes later asking what is the percentage of work done (this is over a month of testing ahead) i could see we would not be getting along. I was acting team leader in all but title, when he told me i wouldn't be promoted, that is when i got angry, and no i didn't curse him, I vented to other people. not sure what happened later behind the scenes, but shortly after i was promoted and the guy was gone ..go anger.

the other event is the tzunamy, not the one in Indonesia that happened around that time, but some one i met that made my life heaven and hell at the same time, we would break up and get back together for the next 2 years, with major confusion for myself and my family who were very un supportive in the beginning, the middle, and probably the end.

Year 29

I returned to Raanana and tzunami moved in with me for several months, I was getting more serious and ready, but was was still driven insane, 10 calls a day for example.... but I was doing very well at work and school... this was the year i began to write. i had considers writing for a while, but nothing ever came out of it. till I was walking with my friend shai in tel aviv and I got this idea, that evening i started writing... I didn't get far, around 20-30 pages (season one) , I enjoyed it, i should have kept going, it seems that writing is one of my better skills, how can i make this my job?

Year 30

I went with my dad for a pre trip. a pre trip is a trip before the trip to see the terrain , identify bus route (he is a tour guide) , he does it before every trip. I went on several of these so it didn't seem strange, we looked at several places in the south, then we went to Dimona to meet Ronit who went to school not far from there. he was driving really slow (10 under instead of ten over) which seem odd but didn't give it much thought. we arrived at the Dimona mall, grabbed a sandwich and waited. a while later i see my mom in that mall (its about 2 hours from our house), I still don't get it, then I spot my friends Amit and shai and it takes me another seconds to realize this is a surprise event of some kind, the best kind since it involves a trip... fun weekend in Eilat.

Year 31

a slight demographic change with a move to Cleveland. shortly after arriving I heard my twenties song on the radio and decided to let it go, this switch was long time in the making, instead i chose 2 songs... which I try to live my life by,,maybe i will remember to reveal them at the end of the decade. other noticeable things, i ate a certain cookie in Amsterdam, felt strange, not sure if because i wanted it to feel strange, that was it.

Year 32 met my better half and knew it early on, a good year for local travel, hikes, amazing snow related activities. unique memory , i was horse back riding in Tennessee, more accurately horse sitting while the horse rides, about half way through the trail, a big tree was half way fallen on the trail, just above the horse height, the horse pushed to the right where the tree was lower and i had no where to go but grab the log and hold on, the horse kept going with one on my shoes and literally left me hanging...

Year 33 other than saying I do... I always had a problem with completing projects, for example, i have more then enough credits for a biology degree, way over what is needed, just not the right ones, same with work, i love starting things, not great at the finish. so when i took on a race challenge, in an area i was never good at, but the goal was important, i knew i couldn't stop. even a torn muscle on the way only delayed me for a few months, but i got back on the horse (figuratively this time) ignored the log and kept going meeting the sportive goal and the fundraising one (though i had to help quite a bit). I was very pleased with my self for the completion and all the activities i had to arrange to raise funds. I am better with projects now, still not great but improving... to bad that race busted my hip but it was worth it ( from a personal growth perspective).

Year 34

Said I do for the 2nd time (our 2nd wedding) , got a house, started mowing the lawn. but unrest at work, i was thinking about leaving for over a year, but stayed. worked too hard for too little credit and for a boss i despised. this was the surgery year, not a fun experience with the complications that followed. but one thing I did do is re join D&D. I love this game, its the nerd version for poker. the best aspect of it for me is that i participate in writing the story as we go along, though nothing is actually written, i feel like a writer.

Year 35, finally made the decision to leave the company, though no new plans and major uncertainty about the future. the 2 big trips in the summer was a much needed respite of the constant stress of the last days of the company. why are events from this year harder to find, I actually submitted a column to a magazine, got turned down, but the 1st move of doing what i want, i should try again. over all a tough year with un employment, but it turned out well, with a stable but boring job.

Year 36

so far some new activities, like flying and golf - both equally exciting....not... I intend to continue school and maintain my A ( still waiting for final tests to confirm) and perhaps get something published. my fingers are tingling , its a feeling i get before writing something... cross your fingers, i cant, its harder to type that way

cheers and hoping to have an exciting year. hope you enjoyed this and perhaps learned something new that i have not told before, I tried not to go for the obvious things and i know its very good to self analyze , its something you should do ever 35 years or so...

cheers

blogil

Saturday, May 26, 2012

some photos of demon grapes, clever beasts, space and magic

Friday, May 25, 2012

Enjoy one too many photos of rock climbing in W Virginia

Monday, May 21, 2012

On tree hugging and very tall trees

Saturday, May 12, 2012

35 years in personal review

Friday, May 11, 2012

eye eye captain

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